This is for the times you went through hell so someone else wouldn’t have to.
- while eating food: hell yassss ne regrats i feel alive nobody can stop me now
- the aftermath: shit im so fat why did i have to do that why can't just fucking say no god what's wrong with me, etc.
you’re not allowed to wear a cotton t-shirt unless you’re a true fan! do you go to the fields and look at it? do you appreciate the agricultural implications of a gigantic cotton industry? do you understand the harvesting process? name 5 cotton harvesting machines. didn’t think so
i envy people that come up with witty comebacks on the spot because i’m gonna need at least a 3 day notice
don’t underestimate me. i’ll wear sweaters in the summer. i’ll eat like eighteen gallons of ice cream in the winter. fuck the temperature. i don’t give a fuck
i want a threesome with zac efron and dave franco is that too much to ask